Four Years
by mindset
Summary: My life had been different that I then realized, letting him go was the biggest mistake of my life. ExT


Disclaimer: I no own Cardcaptor Sakura and will never be. I no own the song "Invincible" it was sung by a local Filipino artist named Christian Bautista and the song "Photo" by Ryan Cabrera. And yes, the bonus part at the bottom was inspired by the ending of the show "Lois and Clark".

Author's Notes: Yes, this is the pretty much awaited ending of my fanfic "Completely". I'm really sorry to tell you this, minna-chan, but I am discontinuing that one. Permanent writer's block, blame it. I lost my muse for it eons ago. That is why I am posting this one as a stand alone. And even before I started writing that fic, I already have this ending in mind. Yes, how absurd was that? XD

Dedications: I dedicate this to my koishii, Khallaene King A. Enriquez. The day I typed this one I promised myself that I would only post it when I fall in love again, and here I am madly in love with my Yoru-kun. How cheesy can I get? XP I love you, dear, so much.

* * *

It's been exactly four years and the memories are still fresh in my mind as if it only happens yesterday. The memory in which I met, I befriended, I worked, I dated and I loved the prince of England. I loved? Now, that's what we get when undergoing self-denial. The truth is I still love him… I really do.

Sometimes, I caught myself imagining what could've happen to our relationship if I just told him the truth rather than discovering it himself at a wrong time. What could've happen if I just told him what I really feel and what he really means to me rather than those false cover ups I conjured to led him away from me, away from my life.

The day that he left the country, I wanted to burst out and cry. I guessed it was too late for the both of us, or rather for me. Years have passed, and now everything in my life had change. I am no longer a chamber maid in a white and dark blue uniform. I am now the General Manager of the same hotel where I've met my prince before.

How so?

After Eriol had left Japan, Touya had asked me if I would like to continue my study. I've been unsure at first since how can he suddenly be financially stable to provide both me and Sakura courses in college, we all know that he himself was working hard for the future of his own family.

He just shrugged it off and told me that a friend of his is willing to support us. I asked him who this 'friend' of his is. He just told me that it wasn't important and what matter most is that Sakura and I could finish our schooling and have a better future.

I accepted his offer after three consecutive nights of thinking. At first, I accepted it to prove something. I want to prove that I am capable of achieving something, but as time goes by, I realized that I'm not only doing this for myself or rather for my family and friends. I'm doing this in thinking that maybe one day Eriol would come back, and I could already prove myself worthy of his love… and him.

Weeks after my graduation, I was already hired by Tokyo Intercontinental Hotel as its new General Manager. How could that be? By taking extra classes in the summer months, I managed to obtain a master's degree in business in just four years and I graduated top of my class. And as they say, when you have good grades and school records, you don't have to find a job… the job will surely find you. I received a lot of offers from different companies and business operations alike, but I only choose Tokyo Intercontinental for reasons you already know.

And when I thought that Eriol had already left my life, for keeps. Touya had revealed to me that this 'friend' of his that supported us financially in college for four years was Eriol, himself. He told me that the prince had asked him a favor before he left. He asked Touya to persuade me to continue my studies and he'll cover all the expenses, in secret of course.

He knows full well that I wouldn't accept if I had known prior that it was him who's going to support me. But still I couldn't help but to feel regretful, four years ago I hurt him and denied that I ever love him, and he still helped me to reach my dreams. If it wasn't for him, I don't think I'll be here signing important papers than cleaning every room in this building.

My life had been different that I then realized, **letting him go was the biggest mistake of my life**.

No matter the amount of artistic success I gained, no matter the academic accomplishments I achieved, no award I won seemed important. Nothing could ever make me feel worthy of the label 'living being'. In my heart I am not alive. Despite years upon years of struggling beyond emotional endurance, no matter how hard I tried, I had never fully fit in with the rest of this new world without him.

Well, what can I do? Past is past and nothing can change it. If there's anyone who's in love right now and is having doubts all I can say is that, "If there's still enough time to tell them what you really feel, then so be it... Gather enough courage to make them know what they really mean for you..."

My thoughts had been disrupted when Sakura entered the office. Oh, did I mention that she's the Assistant General Manager? It just seems appropriate since we have the same schooling and she's my best friend. And for the fact that we both worked here as a chamber maids before, sounds like 'from rags to riches' kind of story to me.

"Tomoyo-chan, having trip down to memory lane once again?" I heard her asked me. I think I've been lost for several minutes which explain why I did only heard the last part of what she was saying.

"Sorry, just been thinking and all. What were you saying again?"

She heaved a deep sigh to calm her nerves, she's tensed I can tell. "He's back…"

"Who?"

She sighed once again, "Tomoyo, you know full well whose back…"

By the looks she's giving me, I know she's already annoyed. "Sorry, Sakura… I just thought that they had just sent the wrong data to me earlier, I never thought he'd be back anyway."

"He is and you know he will!" She's giving me death glares now.

"Well, after what I've done to him four years ago… Anyone would think that he despises this place already."

Sakura's angry by now, "You only believe what you know is right but keep disregarding what you know is real! Tomoyo, you know that he's incapable of grudge much less to you of all people. Hence, he helped us with our studies so we'll have much better futures. Tomoyo, he's a good man… Everyone knows that."

Okay, that hit a nerve. "I know that! Every time I think of all the things he had done for me, for us… I can't help but feel that I'm never gonna be enough for him, he deserves so much better!"

"You're belittling yourself so much, Tomoyo…" She said, calmly this time.

I sighed. "I know, and I can't do anything about it…"

Sakura took my hands in hers, "You can… Tell me, Tomoyo, would you let this opportunity to slip just like that? The Tomoyo I knew would do anything, would go at any length just to lead someone like Eriol back in her life…"

"Do you think he'll accept me back?" I told her as I tightened my grip on her hands.

"He will, cause if not… Why would he be here?"

I look at her, tears blurring my view. "What if he's engaged or something? Or worst, he don't love me anymore…"

"He asked you to trust him, Tomoyo-chan, and if he says he loves you…he really does! Besides, I thought you're watching the news? Have you ever heard him being engaged or anything?" Sakura said, smiling.

"No, I never heard any engagement or him being linked to anyone…" I said as I returned the smile.

She laughed lightly, "So what are you planning now?"

I put a finger on my chin as if I'm thinking very hard, "How about… Try to win him back?"

"Tomoyo, really, try? As in try?!" She said as she looks at me, flabbergasted.

I laughed at her expression; she's so cute when looking like that. "Okay…okay… **I will** win him back…"

"Much better!" She said whilst hugging me tightly. I'm really thankful to have a sister like her, I wouldn't want to know what my life could have been if she's not by my side as well as the others that had made a great impact to change my life.

"So, how do I start?"

Sakura released me from her hug, "He's now in the same suite he had occupied four years ago, talking with Meiya…"

"Meiya?"

"Yeah, the same angel who led him to you. Now go! Win him back and be happy, the both of you!" She last told me before she pushes me out of my own office, forcefully might I add.

That explains why I'm here contemplating whether to knock or not to knock at his door, what is this? A matter of life and death? Come on, Tomoyo, just knock and get over it! The earlier the better. Besides, he's talking with Meiya inside so when the worst of times come in and he doesn't want to see me, I can just tell him that Meiya was being called by her mother and leave. Just like that.

Gods, as if I can…

So I gather all the courage and energy I could ever muster and knocked at that freaking door and finished my life. It's not as if he's going to jump off and attacked me for hurting him four years ago, right? Okay, this is bad…very bad. Tomoyo, just show him what a true Amamiya woman is… face him and all the possible consequences. It's not as if you're gonna lose something if this time he's the one to deny you, right?

Yeah, just a broken heart and a body without a soul. Just four years without him and Sakura had already told me that I look like a robot processed from head to toe. Not a very good news to hear first thing in the morning might I tell you. It just gives you an overview on how miserable my life had been ever since he left.

So I knocked at the forsaken door and for a second I thought the heavens love me. There stood with her angelic glory, my darling charge, Kinomoto Meiya. I guess Eriol is that tired or just plain busy to open the door himself and I'm not a bit complaining. The Gods had just spared my life for a while longer, they decided that I've been good and might as well enjoy what I've got for the time being.

"Rio-niichan is playing the piano. He's very good at it, you should hear it yourself, Tomoyo-chan!" The little angel said before dragging me towards the room where Eriol and the piano are. And here I thought that the Gods had spared my life, too much for hoping I guess.

She brought me at the lounging room. How I know? Simple, I did clean this room years ago and it just so happen that only one person had been its occupant. Yeah, after Eriol had left, I never had the courage to enter this room ever again. And now he's back…

He was seated at a concert piano, apparently too absorbed in his playing to become aware of newly added audience, which is me, at the door. I did not recognized the melody at first but still I had it in myself to appreciate its simple beauty. But I did remember its title when he somehow sings the lyrics. I never thought he had such wonderful voice, well, I don't know a lot of things about him either.

I don't have nerves of steel  
I have a heart that feels  
I may have cried a million tears but I wont drown

I let myself unfold  
Gave you my hand to hold  
You took me beyond where I could see  
And then you let go of me…

He was uncommonly good, and the notes his fingers brought forth fell on her ears like a gentle rain. Unconsciously, I began to relax against the doorjamb as his music stirred long-unused emotions in me: the kind of pure happiness that he used to kindle in me. He's nearing the chorus now, and I could feel his emotions whirling with the music he creates.

I was damaged by the fall  
Got the wind knocked out of me  
To be standing here at all  
I must be invincible

I thought that I would break  
But now I have come to see  
Something strong and beautiful  
Inside of me  
I must be invincible. . .

But this music. His music. It evoked memories of happier daydreams, mental images of an inner place very alien to the now black-scoured tunnels of my mind. In the oh-so-distant tinkling of the piano I was shown the way back to an old, favorite imaginary haunt. And from there, the answer came to me…

I dont have X-rays eyes  
Don't have a heart so wise  
How could I have known  
You'd let me down  
If I had known that then  
My eyes are wide open  
I still believe I would've missed it

I was damaged by the fall  
Got the wind knocked out of me  
To be standing here at all  
I must be invincible

I've been a fool to let him go at the first place and much more of an idiot to doubt about his heart.

It's a blessing and a curse

But you find out just  
What you've worth…

All to abruptly the song ended, but now I know… **He still loves me**. And for that, I am more than happy to have him back in my life. I may be a fool, I might have been an idiot but I tell you… We continue to love inspite the pain, tears and heartaches. Perhaps the pain make us stronger, the tears make us braver and the heartaches makes us wiser. I would not commit the same mistake as I have done four years ago. For sure.

After his mini-concierto, our eyes met. Words aren't needed to convey any feeling we have inside. One thing is certain, **We both want each other back in our lives**.

"What song do you want me to play?" I heard him ask me. The very first sentence he had spoken to me after four agonizing years. And it's about a song? How romantic can you get?

"Photo…"

He smiled at me before turning his attention back at his piano. Someday I might find myself extremely jealous of that piano. He looks at it like no other, as if he's making love with his music. Oh great, my mind's contaminated right now. Surely I'm messing with your romantic thoughts this time, ne?

His eyes locked with mine once again, before he returned his gaze to the sheets of paper in front of him and continued to glide his fingers over the ivory keys of his grand piano, his smile never leaving his face. Then he started to sing...

A photo can say a thousand things

But it can't say the million things I wanna say

A photo can capture the way we were

But it can't capture the way we are

'Cause you're far away

What it's like to know you

What it's like to touch you

I sat immobilized in front of him. Did he know that he was slowly, but surely, piece by piece, taking every bit of my heart? Because I had once been burned by the very emotions that I was feeling now, I had tried incredibly hard not to let him do that very task. But it seemed that resist was futile. I remember the very first time we met and had a leisurely walk in the park with Meiya, then the next day, I was assigned to clean his room and saw a painting of me that he himself had made.

When you told me that you loved me

Were those just words

You can't tell me you don't need me

And I know that hurts

'Cause I'm looking at your picture

'Cause it's all I've got

Maybe one day

You and me will have one more shot

The way he looked at me, such fire in his eyes, and the way his voice sounded, as if he truly meant the words, and that they were directed to me, was enough to drown me in confusion and complete uncertainty. This did not happen to me. Ever since that particularly painful experience, I was always in control, my feelings reeled behind a tight leash. But as the melodious notes continued to float to my ears, I felt my resolve slowly melt away. My heart beat crazily in my chest as my mind struggled to sort out the situation.

Timing lost minutes and moments

And I might be lonely girl

But I'm not afraid

In a second

It all comes right back to me

Nothing's forgotten now

Yeah everything's saved

What it's like to touch you

What it's like to know you

When you told me that you loved me

Were those just words

You can't tell me you don't need me

And I know that hurts

'Cause I'm looking at your picture

'Cause it's all I've got

Maybe one day

You and me will have one more shot

Now I understand what Meiling had told me before. "When two hearts are meant to be, no matter how long it takes, no matter how far they go, no matter how tough it seems. Faith will always bring them together to share a life forever…" I just have to take my chance and be happy…

You were my life

You were my faith

You gave me hope every day

When you told me that you loved me

Were those just words

You can't tell me you don't need me

And I know that hurts

'Cause I'm looking at your picture

'Cause it's all I've got

Maybe one day

You and me will have one more shot

Once the last strands of notes from the piano died in the air, he turned completely towards me and I knew I had his full attention. The doubts of him sharing my feelings even after he had sang the song so sincerely was dismissed as he wordlessly wrapped me in his arms and held me close to him.

"This time, would you deny me once again, Tomoyo?"

I looked at him in the eye and ask, "Why did you let me wait for four years? Do you know what kind of hell I've been through without you?"

He sighed, "I would've come back much earlier, but you're not yet ready to accept me, Tomoyo. I know you needed time and space to think and to accomplished things for yourself. You're full of dreams and I want you to reach for it, that time, you're belittling yourself too much…"

My eyes fluttered shut as I rested my head on his shoulder, feeling** complete**. I know that my heart is once again at risk of being broken, but as he cupped my chin and raised my face to his, I found that at that moment, it did not matter. After all, was love not one big risk in itself?

"I'd be damned if I ever let you walk away from my life again…"

Then he kissed me.

Sitting at the piano bench was Meiya with a huge lollipop in hand, beside her was Spinel…

**For never was a tale of more love, than this of Eriol and his Tomoyo...**

* * *

**Bonus:**

They were seating on a love seat, hugging and all.

Suddenly, Tomoyo faced Eriol and said, "I love you more. More than I ever have and more than I ever thought I could love anyone. And so, I want to ask, will you marry me?"

Eriol looked at her, shocked. "You're asking me to marry you?"

Tomoyo sighed. "Well, yes. Technically, it would be wrong if the woman was first to proposed. But to hell all the traditions, I want to marry you. And when I say that I wouldn't let you out of my life once again, I meant it for life."

Eriol kissed her temple, "You're really something…"

"Of course…"

"So, who's asking? Daidouji Tomoyo or Daidouji Tomoko?"

Tomoyo stared at him, curiously. "But Eriol, their technically one person…"

"No, princess, for me, their different person…"

Tomoyo sighed again. "Well, who's answering? Hiiragizawa Eriol or the Prince of England?"

"I'm answering…" Eriol said as he took her hands in his.

Tomoyo leaned her head on his shoulder, "I'm waiting…"

"_**Yes, I'm marrying you…"**_

_**

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Author's End Notes: **_Thank you for staying with me! XD Please do review.**  
**


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